We have all fallen for someone’s empty promises. I’m watching Happiness Ever After on Netflix, and there is a scene when Princess confronts Leo about the promises he made to be there for their daughter Khandi and how he didn’t live up to his end of the bargain. I was also at a dinner party recently and a man named Kevin opened up about someone he thought was his best friend that stole all of his money from his business because he fell for his promises that he was going to help him build it. How many promises get broken in a day?
I feel like breaking promises comes naturally to people now like breathing does. I think about all of the broken promises I endured. How much I’ve blamed people for disappointing me so much, but let me trace the broken promises that I make to myself and they mirror almost perfectly. Ask yourself how many promises have you broken with yourself? Mine are definitely a lot. Everything from working out, to working harder on my businesses to waking up earlier. It’s like what Paul said, “the things I ought to do I don’t and the things I wish not to do I do.” Is it possible we’re hurt because we gave other people the job to keep their promises and to love us even though we were not doing it for ourselves? People think that they need apologies from other people when they should be apologizing to themselves. People can’t mistreat you without your permission. We break our own boundaries and then get mad at people for essentially being themselves.
Zimkhitha (in the same movie) tells Yonda that he only fails in a relationship when he refuses to try at love again after he fell for someone’s promises of marriage who left him at the altar. If you stay devastated at what people have done to you then they win, and you poison your present moment with the memories of that pain, and you deplete yourself of the ability to change your situation. If you’re reading this then you’re alive and you were given a chance that millions of people didn’t get today to heal, learn and grow. Don’t waste your time regretting the past, you couldn’t have done anything else, you’re exactly where you should be right now.
The most important relationship is with yourself, the most important promise is the one you keep with yourself. So start with the promises that you make to yourself and keep them. Change the relationship with yourself and you will change the relationships that you attract. You can’t demand people to treat you better than you treat yourself, it doesn’t work that way.
